Are we the most engaged and empowered generation of women over 50 in recorded history? Most days it certainly feels like it. Not only are we 37 million strong, but our generation is the first to truly embrace second adulthood and celebrate our ‘Pride of Age” birthdays.

Among the national organizations creating a road map for our generation and a voice for women who continue to change the rules is The Transition Network (TTN). Founded ten years ago, TTN has become a national community of women – 50 and forward – who support each other as they continue a life of learning, engagement and leadership in the world.

TTN is a community of vibrant women with chapters in thirteen locations around the country – from New York to California (http://www.thetransitionanetwork.org).

Last week, I had the wonderful experience of being with TTN New York City members at their 10th Annual Dinner – a joyous celebration of their continued growth as a national organization, commitment to the Caring Collaborative and Milestone Birthdays.

Four Special Stories from the Evening’s ‘Pride of Age’ Celebrants:

Madeleine Payamps, 60
Thursday, May 26 – was my 60th birthday. I celebrated by leaving a corporate job that was no longer fulfilling. Although I could have just settled in for another five years or so, I knew I would never be able to quiet that deafening voice inside my head that kept asking me, “Is this it?” So, instead of being frozen in fear of the unknown, I chose to take a huge leap of faith to pursue my passion — coaching women in transition — just like me. Without even realizing it, I’d been preparing for this moment for many years. Our finances are solid, I’m healthy and fit, and I’m ready for the next big thing! Life without a cubicle? Bring it on!

Rae-Carole Fischer, 65
The best part of turning 65 is now I have a ½ price Metro card, I use it to take the bus down to the Lincoln Plaza Cinema. When I arrive I can buy my discounted movie tickets without fear. I am told they “card you” to make sure you are really as old as you say you are! In the past I would be afraid of being “carded” and denied a discount ticket because I was under 65. Oh, the embarrassment of being denied that ticket…

The saddest part of turning 65 is that young people offer me their seats on public transportation. Besides that I am a happy camper!

About TTN: I first heard about TTN while I was reading the weekend edition of The Wall Street Journal in 2008. My husband was extremely ill and I knew that our time together was finite. I suddenly realized that I would be alone for the first time in a long time and the article mentioned the Caring Collaborative …a way to connect with women who could be there to help me and where I could offer my experience to others who were caregivers for someone they loved…

It took a minute to get on the website and five minutes more to join the organization. A very wise decision on my part.

Sherry Dworsky, 70
I was an Executive Search Consultant, headhunter, for 25 years and specialized in corporate human resources for 10 years. I worked with top corporations, traveled around the country and met diverse and wonderful people. For me, the question one day became – Do I want to be sitting behind this desk, satisfying as it is, when I am 70? What comes next in life?

And now I am 70, no desk, new friends, new work, time to play. It took a couple of years to find this next new path… part time work, job search consulting, volunteering and TTN. Through TTN I have found a community of women who share a passion for new goals, intellectual curiosity and a virtual place to find the voice of our generation, along with a desire to make this next part of life the best.

Ravelle Brickman, 75
It’s hard to believe, but I will be celebrating my 75th this summer. What a strange thing to happen to someone who is still — in her own mind at least — somewhere around the age of 19.

Because I have always thought of myself as much younger than I am, I did not actually acknowledge — let alone embrace — my true age until five years ago, when I decided to “come out” at TTN’s ‘Pride of Age’ ceremony in 2006.

Admitting — to myself as well as others — that I was 70 was a great shock, from which I am still recovering. However, the shock has been ameliorated by the fact that other women in TTN, who also look young, are roughly the same age. Moreover, they are also, like me, still working in one way or another and still leading incredibly active lives.

Now that I’ve admitted to being a septuagenarian — even the word sounds grim — I have one more thing to laugh at. The truth is that nothing has changed. If anything, I feel happier than I did at 55 or 60. I am certainly better off, and more optimistic about everything that life can offer.

Of course, I’m lucky. I’m in good health, full of energy, with four fabulous granddaughters, interesting work — some of which actually pays the rent — and a busy life that allows me to keep learning new things.

I owe much to TTN, both for its credo of celebrating age and for its cadre of like-minded women, all embarked on the same adventure and all with the same positive outlook on life.

At the end of the evening, it was clear to me that TTN membership is the best gift we can give ourselves. Being part of a vibrant community of women has never been easier. Find out more about The Transition Network, locate a chapter in your city or start one, and celebrate your next ‘Pride of Age’ Birthday at a TTN event.

Visit TTN and learn more:

http://www.thetransitionnetwork.org
http://ttncaringcollaborative.org

“It took a minute to get on the website and five minutes more to join the
          organization. A very wise decision on my part.” — Rae-Carole Fischer

Recently I came upon a photograph of myself in my first bikini (it was really a two-piece, compared to what goes as a bikini these days) and I was struck by how good I looked. That thought lasted about two minutes until I realized that when that picture was taken, I thought I looked fat and bulky; I was not happy to be looked at. Then I realized that I feel the same way today. Fat and bulky. Plus, wrinkled and saggy. What a waste, I thought, not feeling good about my body back then. And just as much of a waste feeling ashamed of it now. As one woman said to me after having the same then-and-now photo revelation, “We’d better start appreciating ourselves now or we will look back in a few years and wish we looked as good as we did then.” It’s time to get rid of this second guessing about our appearance, and try to accept that even if our bodies don’t look as good as they once did, we can feel better about our Selves than we did back then.

Many of us have had body image problems all our lives. Most of us have body image problems now that our bodies are changing. Some of it is due to growing up in a culture where women were supposed to be beautiful, and thin and doll-like. That made it impossible for me to appreciate how I looked as opposed to how models and celebrities and role models told me I was supposed to look. (There is some consolation in the certitude that those same models and celebrities are sagging now too.)

One way to look at the current situation is that the pressure is finally off. In the same way as we are reconsidering our expectations in many areas of our lives, women tell me of changing their standards for what they expected from their bodies; one woman put it this way, “You know I’m into ‘fit’ now as opposed to ‘fat.’ I may not look as glamorous, but I can put my suitcase up on the rack on the airplane. I get so much satisfaction out of feeling strong and fit that I don’t focus so much on skin tone and all those things that you can’t do anything about.” My trainer tells me that she has noticed that when her clients turn fifty or when they go through menopause, or become grandparents, they get serious about being healthy and fit; they aren’t so much exercising for appearance as they are for long-term health and for feeling strong. The body image is internal. I often laugh at myself because I used to look fit on the outside and I was nothing but flab on the inside, now it’s the reverse.

We all have good days and bad days, and there’s no getting around that. But we have a new source of healing humor. I have had some of my best laughs with my friends when we get together and someone announces that she’s discovered a new decrepitude. First of all it’s a relief because we’ve probably noticed it on ourselves and not wanted to pay attention to it, but also the camaraderie is infinitely supportive. What I hate are the put-downs, the birthday cards and snide poems that make cruel fun of our looks; when we laugh at those, we are laughing at ourselves, not with each other. For me, there is a big difference between the sort of empowering laughter, and the humor that is, to me anyway, a continuation of the self-disgust that we grew up with.

The pressure is off in other areas too. Including sex. We used to be encouraged to see other women as rivals, so we always had to compare ourselves to them and try to be sexier, or more beautiful or thinner. Now that we are, for the most part, all on the same side, the self-doubt can be handled differently. Many of the women I have interviewed for my next book How We Love Now have told me that when they find a right relationship in their fifties and sixties it’s amazing how un-self-conscious they feel when they get down to the sex part, that they just feel accepted for who they are by themselves and by the other person. What they are focusing on is not how they look, but on how they feel, on what will give them pleasure and their partner pleasure rather than on how they look.

There is a scene in the movie “It’s Complicated” – directed by Nancy Myer — that takes place the morning after the Meryl Streep character has just slept with her ex, played by Alec Baldwin. He waddles off into the bathroom looking… his age, while she gets up smiling and starts wrapping herself up in the sheet. He is confused. “But we were naked last night, what are you doing this for?” And she replies, “We were lying down then.” That line embodies (get it?) the kind of good-natured acceptance of how her body looks with gratitude for how it works.

Seeking the Buddha Nature in a Kayak

Gliding parallel the shoreline
Nanoseconds of now
And
Fleeting instances of the present
Come to pass
Along with skeletal shaped shoots
And clusters of seldom cut caryopsis
Advancing and retreating
Teasing the mind and eye
Making common cause
The competition
Between anticipation and now.

Joyce Ellen Weinstein
June 2011

Joyce Ellen Weinstein finds inspiration in the personal and emotional as well as the interaction developed through self, family and community, all of which are parts of making the whole of her unified body of work.

To learn more about Joyce Ellen Weinstein and her work, please visit:

Joyce Ellen Weinstein – fine artist
www.joyceellenweinstein.com

BlueStone Gallery
104 East Ann St…
Milford, PA
www.bluestonegallerymilford.com

We all know walking is just about the most perfect exercise.

Out the door, one foot in front of the other, 30 to 50 minutes – three or more times per week and you’re on your way to feeling fit.

I joined the Rosedale Walking Group, to be healthier, but more importantly, I wanted to connect with other women. And, I was lucky. I met a small group of feisty and inspiring women – ages from 30s to 70s – at the Rosedale Running/Walking Room in Toronto.

Together, we learned about proper shoes, bras, nutrition, stretches, core work, etc. We all knew some of this stuff, but we learned new things about our own bodies in a different context. We shared health and fitness tips, stories and we learned about each other’s lives.

Our clinics started with short walks, but we quickly progressed to hill training and longer walks.

That’s when everything changed.

We became more deeply committed to the walking, training for races and to each other. The group’s energy propelled us all forward. We entered races in our own city (Toronto), Chicago, Spain and two women from our group traveled to Greece for the 2500th Anniversary of the Olympic Marathon!

How did our group progress from walking 5K to half-marathons and beyond?

The “Secrets” of the Rosedale Walking Group:

1. Stay in the moment – breathe, look around, feel the joy
2. Talk about food, flowers, families, books, movies, the weather – keep it light
3. Avoid politics – for the most part
4. Observe Lucy’s Rule – the longer the walk, the more details needed per story
5. Plan your vacations around walking – see the world in a new way
6. Enter a race – raise money for a cause, reap the admiration of family and friends
7. Keep walking – feel positive about yourself!

As our wonderful coach, Donna Foster-Larocque says: “Stay Active and Anything is Possible.”

Mary Eileen Williams, the warm, lively and informative host of “Feisty Side of Fifty Radio,” promises her listeners: “Give me just fifteen minutes of your time and I’ll give you interviews with authors, actors, and experts who will inspire you to make significant and positive changes in your own life.” And, she delivers on the promise.

Her recent guests include:

• Kathy Smith, leading force in the fitness industry for close to 30 years whose latest video – Ageless with Kathy Smith: Staying Strong – celebrates growing better with age.
• Louise Knight, author of Jane Addams: Spirit in Action, talks about the remarkable and revolutionary Jane Addams and her essay on aging written in 1914: “Need a Woman Over Fifty Feel Old?”
• Marc Freedman, author, boomer expert, and CEO of Civic Ventures whose latest book, The Big Shift: Navigating the New Stage Beyond Midlife, is a call to redraw the map of life and what we typically know as retirement.
• Christina Haag, author of Come to the Edge, a tribute to John F. Kennedy Jr. and a look back at their fifteen-year friendship.
• Linda Francis Lee, bestselling author of Emily and Einstein, an exploration of second chances, reinvention and redemption.
• Kim Johnson Gross, author of What to Wear for the Rest of Your Life: Ageless Secrets of Style, talks about latest trends and tips for Spring fashions.
• Barbara Hannah Grufferman, Huffington Post columnist and author of The Best of Everything After 50: The Experts’ Guide to Style, Sex, Health, Money, and More, who motivates and inspires women to reach for their dreams.
• Betsy Werley, Executive Director of The Transition Network, shares her thoughts and professional experience on transitioning from the corporate world to a career in the nonprofit sector.

Visit Feisty Side of Fifty Radio for LIVE, On Demand or Archived programs. All programs available on iTunes (FREE). You can listen to recent programs here – click on Listen and Share (right sidebar).

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/feisty-side-of-fifty
http://www.feistysideoffifty.com

Women Redefining Life after 50…

Smarter, Bolder, Older™ – a one-day event for women 50+ – grew out of my own experience of aging and conversations with other women. I am committed to changing the stereotype of aging and loss in midlife to one of vitality, embracing new opportunities and possibilities as women in midlife and beyond get clear on what matters and makes the most of this stage of their lives.

I wanted to create an environment where women could come together to share, network and experience this time in our lives as unique and exciting. More than seventy women gathered in a welcoming space in April 2011 for a rich dialogue (in Upper Nyack, NY) and together we explored common questions:

• What’s important to you at 50+ and how is it different than in previous years?
• What energizes and inspires you about growing older?
• What challenges you?
• What would you like to experience and create?

We shared stories about aging, honored women who have led inspiring lives into their 70’s and beyond, and participated in guided lyrical movement patterns to explore power, purpose and transformation. An art installation featured images from the upcoming book: “Goddess on Earth, Portraits of the Divine Feminine” (LUSH Press, July 2011) and we had a performance by Moving Mantras.

We donated the registration fee to The Rockland Community Foundation’s programs for Women and Girls. This was an important aspect of creating the event.

The entire day and response to the event was exhilarating:

“Amazing opportunity…I’m feeling more energized and more focused already!”

“Thank you just doesn’t seem enough for the wonder of the day at ‘Smarter, Bolder, Older.’ And – as many testified — ‘get our bearings’ once again for own creativity and our place in the world”

Enid Weishaus, MSW, founder of Smarter, Bolder, Older™. She previously held positions as Regional Director for Senators Clinton and Gillibrand in the Lower Hudson Valley. Enid teaches success strategies and presentation skills to women who want to be entrepreneurs. For more information, please contact: enidweishaus@optonline.net.

WATCH NOW: Maria Interviews Mary Oliver

I am still confused, of course, but not about feelings. Second Adulthood has brought a new set of emotional needs, and I have looked for poets who speak to those. Mary Oliver, for example, speaks to the strength we can find within ourselves. Her poem “The Journey”- which I quote in Inventing The Rest of Our Lives – is not about loneliness; it is about being alone – and self-sufficient; she evokes the “new voice/ which you slowly recognize as your own.” In a recent interview with Maria Shriver, Oliver points out that in addition to strength and peace, old age has brought her a sense of humor: “I’m funny. I laugh. Life is good.” I love that.

“as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world. “

Grace Paley is the poet of acceptance without bitterness, living with delight, and aging with gratitude. In my new book How We Love Now I use a few lines from a poem in “Begin Again: Collected Poems,” that reminds us that our flesh is also who we are:

“old body old body in which somewhere/
between crooked toe and forgotten head/
the flesh encounters soul/
and whispers you”

And then there is my friend Robin Morgan whose fearless intellect is continuously challenging the wonders and worries of the universe. In Fifty Is the New Fifty I use a few lines from an unpublished poem called “The New Old Woman” to remind us that life is full of ambiguity, that feeling confused, as I did back when I started reading poetry, is part of the human condition:

“The old woman is never wholly who she thinks she is/
because she she’s also always everyone she ever was – /
though never quite the woman others are sure they knew.”

Celebrate National Poetry Month with Maria Shriver, Mary Oliver, Grace Paley and Robin Morgan, visit:
www.mariaschriver.com
www.maryoliver.net
www.graceplaye.com
www.robinmorgan.us

Now that the majority of us boomers have blown out the candles on our half-century birthday cake (and many have waved goodbye to our fifties altogether), I like to say we’ve become the generation to transform the spirit and style of aging. Remaining true to our trailblazing history, we’re far from dissolving into the invisible shrinking violets older women are “supposed” to be. No way—our bodacious, revolutionary spirit is showing zero signs of wilting. In fact, thanks to a hearty dose of menopausal zest, it’s going stronger than ever before!

Special Club for Feisty Boomers

There’s one special club that embodies our celebrated joie de vivre and legendary spunk, The Red Hat Society, and this remarkable organization has become the largest women’s social club in the world. Although attendance at this group’s events will have you seeing red, members are encouraged to pursue the five F’s: fun, friendship, freedom, fulfillment, and fitness. (I might suggest a sixth F—for feistiness. That particular descriptor may have been officially omitted, but it’s certainly implied.)

The Red Hat Society is dedicated to reshaping the way women are viewed in today’s culture and, in pursuit of this mission, has created an impressive legacy of achievements. One of the most recent accomplishments this legendary club can boast is inclusion in the premier cultural collection of the land: The Smithsonian Institution! Yes, the original red fedora purchased by founder Sue Ellen Cooper as well as her purple-feather boa are now nattily displayed in all their colorful glory.

Sue Ellen, the Exalted Queen Mother herself, and Debra Granich, CEO of the Red Hat Society, have graciously shared their thoughts on what it means to wear the eye-catching combo of red and purple in a recent interview on Feisty Side of Fifty Radio. Be certain to tune in to this very special broadcast with these two remarkable women.

In fact, you won’t want to miss a single word. With advice such as “gaudy is good” and “give yourself a title and call yourself a queen” you know these women are celebrating the feisty side of fifty. In the oh-so-colorful fashion befitting the boomers’ spirit and style of aging, the Red Hat Society is one fabulous group. And, better yet, there’s not a single invisible shrinking violet in sight!

Mary Eileen Williams - M.A., N.C.C. – is the founder of Feisty Side of Fifty/ Boomer Women – Celebrating Women 50 and Better, with close to twenty years as a career/life transition counselor, workshop facilitator, and writer. Her most recent book: Land the Job You Love! 10 Surefire Strategies for Jobseekers Over 50. www.feistysideoffifty.com

Red Hat Society – For more information – How to join, Find a chapter near you or Start a chapter – please visit: www.redhatsociety.com

This wonderful photo of Gloria Steinem, Robin Morgan and me was taken by Jenny Warburg at a party we and her son Blake Morgan threw for Robin’s seventieth birthday at Bob’s and my apartment….

Photo Credit: Jenny Warburg

“All this time, and they were still laughing!

And, damned beautiful, too!”

-Robin Morgan

Enjoy and please send us your photos celebrating 50, 60, 70… info@suzannebraunlevine.com

Photo Copyright 2011 (all rights reserved) Jenny Warburg.

www.RobinMorgan.us

www.gloriasteinem.com

A Birthday Story…

By Sharon Morton, founder Grandparents for Social Action

I was born on my father’s 32nd birthday, on February 18, and every year our shared birthday celebration was better than the last one.

There are so many memories of wonderful surprise parties, singing, birthday presents and lots of laughter, hugging and joy. Because our birthdays together were so joyful, and because my father was such a wonderful person, I was profoundly sad when he died five months before my 60th birthday. As our birth month approached, I found I could not face having a birthday without him. I went so far as to ask friends not to send birthday cards, nor acknowledge my birthday in any way.

When I discovered I had to be in Israel for a conference on February 20th, I decided to leave early. I arrived at the La Rome Hotel in Jerusalem on the 17th of February and quietly checked into the hotel. The clerk, glancing at my passport commented, “Oh, you have a big birthday tomorrow.” “Yes,” I said without enthusiasm. That night, there was an unexpected knock on my door. A woman, about my age was standing there and announced that she was assigned to be my roommate for the conference and she too had arrived early. We sat until late in the evening talking about life, and Israel, and jobs, and loves, but not about birthdays.

The next morning, we decided to talk a walk around our beloved city of Jerusalem. As we opened our door, we found a magnum bottle of champagne sitting there with a note. “Happy special birthday to Sharon from the management.” My new roommate asked me about it, and I explained that I had run away from home this year because I could not face being in Chicago on my birthday without my father. She said very little about it, and she asked no more questions.

Later that afternoon, I went back to the room to take a short nap; my new roommate wanted to stay in town to do some shopping. When she returned to the hotel, she asked me to sit out on the balcony of our room. Then she proceeded to bring out appetizers she had purchased from a favorite restaurant of mine, and champagne glasses as well. Dashing into the room, I brought out the champagne. We ate. We drank. We went out for dinner. It was a beautiful birthday: calm, peaceful, and filled with stories about my father and our birthdays. Since then, I always feel a certain sadness each year as my birthday approaches, but certainly not the despair I felt that first year.

Soon I will celebrate my 70th birthday. Only this week, I began thinking that I wanted to have a really big celebration. I didn’t know why I suddenly wanted to do something big. Then I received a note suggesting that people write about their 60th or 70th birthdays for this website.

It became crystal clear why I want to celebrate. I guess I am ready now to celebrate my life, as well as my father’s. And this is a great year to do it! So you are invited.

Sharon Morton is founder of Grandparents for Social Action and serves as its Executive Director. She is the grandmother of five grandchildren ages 4 to 15. She is an inspirational storyteller and travels throughout the United States to talk with grandparents about social action. To learn more, visit:

Grandparents for Social Action – www.grandparentsforsocialaction.org

Educating and engaging seniors to do social actions; empowering grandchildren to make the world a better place; and creating a legacy from one generation to another.