When I went to work at Ms. in 1972, I wore a matching pink skirt and blouse — and a girdle. I had just gotten married and was, therefore, not able to get a bank loan without my husband’s approval. I had given up playing basketball (half-court for girls) in college because no coach or court could be found. And I had had an illegal abortion.

Actually it was having had that abortion that was my first tie to Ms. and the women’s movement. The Preview Issue of the magazine, which was excerpted in New York magazine, included among such classics as “Click! The Housewife’s Moment of Truth” by Jane O’Reilly and “I Want a Wife” by Judy Syfers, a list of celebrity names under the headline “We Have Had Abortions.” It took a lot of courage back then to admit to what was a crime. In the corner was a coupon which readers could fill out to add their name to the list. I filled it out with pride and relief (I hadn’t admitted to my crime before), and by the time those coupons were being counted and processed several months later, I was managing editor of Ms.

Click here to read the full article…

It seems self-evident that generations can reinforce each other – by sharing the stories of their lives, by working together, and by living together in communities that are responsive to the needs of citizens of all ages. But those communities are too few and far between.

A national organization called generations united™ — supported by the Met Life Foundation — wants to find five of those special communities and honor them for being “on the cutting edge of intergenerational planning and living.”

Founded in 1986, the organization is a catalyst for change and works in collaboration with 100 national, state and local groups representing 70 million Americans. Their mission is “improving the lives of children, youth and older adults through intergenerational collaboration, public policies, and programs.” It is the only national membership organization “building bridges between generations.”

Check out the Awards Announcement [Deadline for Applications: January 31, 2012] and the wonderful profiles of multigenerational families on their site at “Donna’s Blog.”

generations united™
Because we’re stronger together®
www.gu.org

We're Looking for America's Best Intergenerational Communities

I joined the Board of Civic Ventures in 2009, and one of the most inspiring elements of their mission is the discovery and celebration of outstanding social entrepreneurs in the Encore stage of life. The winners of the Purpose Prize have been selected from hundreds of nominees, and having had the honor of being one of the judges, I can tell you that the choices were tough to make; there were many resourceful and courageous candidates for this year’s prizes.

The Purpose Prize is the nation’s only large-scale investment in people over 60 who are combining their passion and experience for social good. Sherry Lansing, CEO, The Lansing Foundation and Chair, Purpose Prize panel of judges has said, that: “The Purpose Prize isn’t a lifetime achievement award. It’s an investment in what these encore innovators – all over 60 – will do next.”

Meet the 2011 Winners of the Purpose Prize – five people who will receive $100,000 each – for improving their communities and the world. Watch their videos here…

Jenny Bowen

Winner of the Purpose Prize for Intergenerational Innovation, sponsored by AARP – Bowen is uplifting the lives of thousands of Chinese orphans

Randal Charlton

Charlton promotes entrepreneurship in Detroit as a means to create jobs and revitalize the struggling city.

Nancy Sanford Hughes

Hughes helps save people in the developing world from catastrophic injury, even death, by replacing the traditional open cooking fire with an efficient stove.

Wajiru Kamau

Kamau helps African immigrants – especially teenagers – adjust to a vastly different life in the United States.

Edward Mazria

Mazria is driving the building sector toward dramatically reducing energy consumption and greenhouse gas emissions.

To learn more about Encore Careers, visit: www.encore.org.

I was interviewed recently for an article about the early days of Ms. magazine, which is about to be forty years old. Soon after that I was interviewed for an article about Our Bodies, Our Selves which was first published around the same time. When thinking about those days and looking at some photographs, my first thought is How Young We Were! And my second is How Brave We Were! Now I have another thought: How Lucky We Were! to be there.

The anniversaries of other empowering moments from the early days of the women’s movement are accumulating. They range across the spectrum from entertainment to sports, to health to legislation to mind-opening books that went where women were not supposed to go. It is amazing to look back four decades – one of the mixed blessings of Second Adulthood – but when the events are as momentous as the emergence of a movement, it is also humbling.

I started working on Ms. with the first monthly issue – Wonder Woman was on the cover. I was pretty up tight in those days; I wore a pink silk shirt and pink pencil skirt to work the first day. Over the seventeen years I was there, I learned a bit about casual dressing and a lot about women and about myself. I would not be the person I am today had I not gotten that job. And I certainly wouldn’t have had the expertise to draw on when I started writing about Second Adulthood.

Ms. reported on the breakthroughs – both personal and political – and staffers participated in many. My responsibilities kept me in the office making editorial decisions for each issue and working with a multitude of experienced and first-time published writers.  Keeping the magazine on schedule was not always an easy job with so many editors and writers traveling to demonstrations, events and fundraisers.

In 1981 I took on an additional project (where did I get the chutzpah?); I produced a documentary history of a century of brave women – an hour-long Ms. Special for HBO called “She’s Nobody’s Baby: American Women in the Twentieth Century.” It won a Peabody Award, the first of many for HBO. A recent biography of Gloria Steinem, also on HBO, highlighted the early days of the magazine (how young we look!) That it was produced by the same ceiling-shattering woman executive, Sheila Nevins, is a wonderful touch of continuity.

Later milestones include Anita Hill’s testimony at the Clarence Thomas confirmation hearings. She showed amazing courage by speaking truth to power, and although she lost the battle (he was confirmed), she won the war for recognition of sexual harassment at work. Next week her legacy will be the subject of a conference called “Sex, Power and Speaking Truth: Anita Hill 20 Years Later.” One of the conveners is a Ms. colleague, Letty Cottin Pogrebin, who like many of the brave women who led the movement is still on the frontlines of change.

Those hearings bring back a personal story. Because of my connection with Ms. I was invited to be one of several commentators in the continuing coverage with Peter Jennings. I don’t remember what else I said, but I do remember I got a lot of points for a wry observation I made about the fact that people across the country were gathered around their TVs in offices and public places. “Well, one thing is for sure; there is a lot less sexual harassment going on at this moment.”
Humor – often black humor like that – was a vital ingredient in the Ms. experience.

Writers Virginia Kerr and Lisa Wohl and editors Suzanne Levine and Marcia Gillespie at the book celebration for Letters to Ms. 1972-1987, (edited by Mary Thom,1987, Henry Holt). Photo: Debbie Millman.

I don’t think any of us could have done what we did without the laughter we shared. One of my favorite Ms. covers was an illustration of a man and a woman [find it below]:

Q. [Male] “Do You Know The Women’s Movement Has No Sense
Of Humor?” says his balloon.

A. [Female] “No! But Hum A Few Bars And I’ll Fake It!” says hers.

Photos: INSIDE Ms.: 25 Years of the Magazine and the Feminist Movement, by Mary Thom (Henry Holt, 1997)

I am thrilled to announce that my “papers” – the boxes of stuff that I always meant to sort our and never did – from my years at Ms. Magazine (1972 – 1989) are now in the Sophia Smith Collection of Women’s Archives at Smith College. Along with other collections from those exciting days, including Gloria Steinem’s papers, they should be accessible soon. My papers from my time as (the only woman) editor of The Columbia Journalism Review will be there too.

The Sophia Smith Collection is a major resource of women’s history where our past lives on.

The Sophia Smith Collection
Women’s History Archives at Smith College

The Sophia Smith Collection is an internationally recognized repository of manuscripts, archives, photographs, periodicals and other primary sources in women’s history. It was founded in 1942 to be the library’s distinctive contribution to the college’s mission of educating women.

Under the inspired leadership of its first director Margaret Storrs Grierson, the Sophia Smith Collection evolved from a collection of works by women writers into a historical research collection of material documenting the lives and activities of women. In 1946 it was named in honor of the founder of Smith College.

Today, the Collection consists of approximately 650 collections (over 10,000 linear feet) of material in manuscript, print, and audiovisual formats. The holdings document the historical experience of women in the United States and abroad from the colonial era to the present.

Read more…

To learn about Sophia Smith, the first woman to found a women’s college, click here.

To visit Ms. magazine and Ms. online store – click on the Wonder Woman cover.

As a model for one kind of care-getting I describe the Caring Collaborative created by The Transition Network (TTN).

Here is an article that describes how it works….

By Elizabeth Pope
The New York Times
September 11, 2011

Ozier Muhammad/The New York Times - Support Network Charlotte Frank, right, with members of the Caring Collaborative, Shoya Zichy, left, and Pam Ramsden, at Ms. Frank's apartment.

As Ms. Zichy lay helpless on the sidewalk, Pam Ramsden came along, on her way to visit the same woman, who was recovering from a traffic accident. “I couldn’t let Shoya go to the hospital alone, so I jumped in the ambulance with her,” said Ms. Ramsden. “I’ve never seen anyone in such pain.”

Ms. Ramsden, 67, spent the next 10 hours in a hospital emergency room with Ms. Zichy and accompanied her home in a taxi at 1 a.m. “I was so grateful she was there, because I was in shock and could barely function,” said Ms. Zichy, a corporate career coach in her 60s…

Read more…

TTN CARING COLLABORATIVE

The Caring Collaborative is an innovative model for aging in community developed by The Transition Network, a growing non-profit organization for women over 50 who join forces to successfully navigate life’s transitions.

The TTN Caring Collaborative is laying the groundwork for a support system to allow women to live independently through the exchange of information and services organized by and provided by peers in the TTN community.

After a year of testing, the Caring Collaborative is poised to become a new national model for organizing care and support among members in the community. In less than one year, members logged more than 500 hours of caring exchanges! Join now!

http://www.ttncaringcollaborative.org/

In 1963 Betty Friedan’s Feminine Mystique identified The Problem That Has No Name—a soul-destroying malaise and sense of uselessness that beset the woman who had bought into the “mystique” of perfect wife, homemaker, and mother. Because she wasn’t happy, she thought something was wrong with her. The second wave of the Women’s Movement gave a name to that problem and countless other experiences that women were afraid to discuss.

Everything changed in the seventies and eighties, and an unintended consequence of the revolution in women’s roles was a new mystique—Having It All. The woman who couldn’t juggle work and family, couldn’t cheerfully “bring home the bacon and fry it up in a pan”—as the Enjoli perfume ad proclaimed—felt once again that something was wrong with her. We struggled to ward off the guilt and break free of that mystique too.

Now, as gender roles adapt to new family values, comes a new mystique—“the male mystique,” so named by the prestigious Families and Work Institute in a recent study. It finds men increasingly stressed out by trying to achieve an unattainable standard of the perfect father, husband, and breadwinner….

Click here to read and share the full article

The Women’s Media Center
Making Women Visible And Powerful In The Media
http://www.womensmediacenter.com

One third of job seekers are now over 55!

How are we doing?

U.S. News and World Report and Mary Eileen Williams are saying job seekers 55 and over are getting more jobs than any other category of workers. We have the lowest unemployment figures. That’s good news!

In a recent television [see right sidebar] interview, Mary Eileen Williams, detailed the good news for those over 55 seeking jobs and offered some critical tips.

Among her tips:

• Tech Skills – get technical skills, sign-up for online training or a course. We do need some of those skills.
• Resume – you must customize your resume to the position skill set that is posted otherwise it will not come up in their scanning. It will not even be seen.
• Presenting your Age/Dates – on a resume you only need to go back 15 years. Put some job titles in a separate category – additional experience – with titles and no date. Do not try to make yourself sound 30 or 35! That’s a mistake.
• Regular Networking – ask friends to review your resume – see if you pass the 30-second test. Employers spend 30 seconds or less before they decide whether to read a resume; your skill set has to pop out at them.
• Action Verbs – take ownership of skill set you are presenting and focus on the results you have produced.
• Younger Employers – it behooves one to bring this up in the interview; for example: throughout my career I have worked with people of all ages, people younger than I am and it has never been a problem.
• LinkedIn – your profile should line-up with everything you have on your resume.

What about a “Thank you” email? Botox? Gray Hair? Find out more by watching the interview.

For a complete guide to getting “The Job You Love!” order her book!

Mary Eileen Williams, M.A.,N.C.C. has more than twenty years combined experience as a career/life transition counselor, workshop facilitator, and writer. She is a Nationally Board Certified Counselor, and specializes in working with women in midlife and mid-career transitions. Her most recent book is, “Land the Job You Love!: 10 Surefire Strategies for Jobseekers Over 50,” Click Here to Buy

She is the founder of the popular blog, Feisty Side of Fifty and host of the Live blogtalkradio program of the same name http://www.blogtalkradio.com/feisty-side-of-fifty

Back in 2000 my first book Father Courage: What Happens When Men Put Family First came out. In it I talked about men who desperately wanted to be more involved with their families and do more of their share at home but were constrained by the workplace culture and the prevailing image of how a Real Man prioritized his work and family. One told me that he was so afraid of getting caught leaving his office at 6:00 p.m. and being thought not committed to his work that he parked in a distant corner of the parking lot. Another told me that when he went to the playground with his baby daughter on a weekday, people assumed one of two things – that he was unemployed (a failure) or a sexual predator.

Since then a lot has changed. My neighborhood is full of fathers pushing strollers or wearing Snugglies or wiping a messy chin at all hours of the day and night. But a new study – by the prestigious and reliable Families and Work Institute – reports that they are paying a price. Men trying to balance work and family have become victims of what they call “The New Male Mystique.” They are stressed out trying to fill a new model of masculinity that is just as oppressive as the Master of the Universe model was twenty years ago – a combination of loving dad, conscientious (and still ambitious) employee, and supportive and responsive husband.

Is this bizarre turn of events just another example of the “be careful what you wish for” retribution? I don’t think so. For one thing, those men are still doing less of the household tasks and childcare than their wives, so in that department, we are still wishing. But I think the stress that now crushes men as well as women who are trying to maintain family life and a serious work life at the same time is due less to impossible role expectations than to the workplace itself.

A lot has changed in our culture, but the shape of our work life has barely shifted off the classic 9-to-5 time frame and the drive-to-the-top career trajectory. Technology has made it possible to work from home and to work all night instead of all day, but flextime, job-sharing, family leave and childcare policies have barely made a chink in the structure. The message remains: when it comes to balancing family and work, there is not enough time to go around – deal with it. We are all on our own.

Parents are not the only sector of the population whose efforts at achieving a meaningful life that combines – in Freud’s words – “love and work” are being stymied by the hidebound workplace; the new generation of Second Adulthood men and women are caught in the same bind. Another recent report – this one from Louis Harris for SunAmerica and Age Wave founder and renowned gerontologist Kenneth Dychtwald – describes another group afflicted by the work-family bind. Entitled “The SunAmerica Retirement Re-Set Study,” it finds that people over fifty intend to work way past the traditional retirement age. Some because they find the work itself rewarding, others because their finances require it, and nearly half (!) of them because they expect to have to help support “aging relatives, adult children, grandchildren, and siblings.” Yes, adult children, including those for whom – I’ll wager – Having It All hasn’t worked out.

Like the young parents, they too would welcome options that would enable them to participate in the working world on more nurturing terms. “Most Americans want increased flexibility in retirement with the opportunity between periods of work and leisure,” says Dychtwald. Of those, a significant group are struggling to find an enriched kind of work for the next chapter, a job that enables them to earn a living and also give back to society, in what Civic Ventures, the think-tank that is devoted to supporting and encouraging this choice, has identified as an Encore Career, one that combines “purpose, passion, and a paycheck.” (Check out their website Encore.org for more on this new movement). Perhaps one byproduct of their efforts to open new categories of work that contribute to society will be an opening up of the workplace itself.

Right now the parallels between these first and Second Adulthood generations are cited as examples of conflicting interests. Older workers, the argument goes, are “sucking the oxygen out of the atmosphere.” Any job we find is one that a younger person will be denied; any social support we get for our stage of life is one they won’t get for theirs – and will have to pay for later. Seeing the situation as a food fight over the same pieces of pie makes it impossible to join forces to enlarge and enrich the pie. As I see it, support for family responsibilities and the opportunity for productive work are not mutually exclusive spheres but a mutually inclusive intergenerational cause; we all – parents and grandparents – can become a force for social change that will bring about a more humane balance love and work.

RESOURCES:

Families and Work Institute (FWI) is a nonprofit, nonpartisan research organization that studies the changing workforce, the changing workplace, the changing family and the changing community.

Ellen Galinsky, President and Co-Founder, co-directs the National Study of the Changing Workforce, the most comprehensive nationally representative study of the U.S. workforce and is the author of highly acclaimed Mind in the Making.
www.familiesandwork.org

Age Wave, founded by Kenneth Dychtwald, Ph.D., is the world’s leader in understanding the effects of an aging population on the marketplace, the workplace, and our lives.
www.agewave.com

SunAmerica Retirement Re-Set a nationwide survey, developed in collaboration with Age Wave and conducted by Harris Interactive, of Americans age 55 and older that takes an in-depth look at the shift in attitudes and actions toward retirement.
retirementreset.com

Civic Ventures is a think tank on boomers, work and social purpose. Civic Ventures’ Encore Careers campaign aims to engage millions of people in encore careers – combining personal meaning, continued income and social impact – to produce a windfall of talent to solve society’s greatest problems.

Marc Freedman, founder and CEO of Civic Ventures, has been recognized by Fast Company magazine three years in a row as one of the nation’s leading social entrepreneurs. His new book The Big Shift: Navigating the New Stage Beyond Midlife was hailed by The New York Times as “an imaginative work with the potential to affect our individual lives and our collective future.”

Encore Careers combine purpose, passion and a paycheck.
www.encore.org

The author, editor of the WMC Exclusives, recalls a moment decades ago that encapsulates the power and purpose of the former First Lady, who died last week at the age of 93.

From right: Betty Ford, Rosalyn Carter, Bella Abzug and Maya Angelou at the Houston Conference. Photo: Jo Freeman

As the wife of a Republican former president, Betty Ford seemed completely comfortable sitting on the dais with her Democratic counterparts. A member of her party, Representative Robert Dornan of California, called it “the greatest tragedy of all” that she and the other first ladies were sitting “properly with their hands in their lap” alongside of Bella Abzug, “approving of sexual perversion and the murder of young people in their mothers’ wombs.” His outrage referred to two of the 26 planks that the widely representative national delegates had brought to Houston from their state conferences and were about to pass overwhelmingly: one favoring gay and lesbian rights—including the right to serve openly in the military—and one demanding the continuing right to abortion and reproductive freedom.

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